[Phil]

PClayton and wife are looking to relocate to another part of the country, since we are fed up with the Golden State, so we are both actively looking for new employment.

I have seen several postings like this one:

Quote

"General Manager"

PURPOSE

Responsible for the overall management/coordination of all aspects of company business at a location including production, sales, technical support, customer service, human resources, safety and administrative activities; plans and directs these functions in order to meet operational and financial goals for the location.

ESSENTIAL DUTIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES

In conjunction with location and regional management develops operating budgets and capital expenditure recommendations in order to meet operational and financial goals for the location.
Recommends and creates operating policies and procedures as required in order to provide consistent guidance to functional teams while establishing team oriented, customer service philosophy and supportive working environment for all location employees.
Conducts periodic management team meetings in order to keep managers informed of news, forecasts and strategies relating to the operation of the location; encourages discussion, proposals for optimizing operations, and entertains issues that impact the productivity of the location.
Has direct responsibility for budget preparation, operating costs, and profitability of the operation.
Participates as part of the Schedule Review Team.
Manages a department to ensure achievement of functional and budget/financial goals.
Supervises assigned employees including staff selection and training; planning, assigning and directing work; conducting performance reviews; rewarding and disciplining employees; addressing complaints and resolving problems.
Understands and observes all safety procedures and practices and ensures that employees observe all safety procedures and practices in order to prevent injuries or damage; schedules periodic safety meetings and solicits recommended changes to improve safety procedures.
Other duties may be assigned.
COMPETENCIES
Advanced knowledge of company products, competitors products and product standards
Ability to compose business reports and budgets
Ability to execute plans/projects through others
Good interpersonal and influencing skills
Excellent verbal and written communication skills
Proficiency in Microsoft Office Suite and an enterprise resource planning (ERP) program

MINIMUM REQUIREMENTS
Bachelor’s degree in Business or related field and ten (10) years related experience; or equivalent combination of education and experience.

WORK ENVIRONMENT / PHYSICAL ACTIVITY The work environment and physical activity described are representative of those that must be met by an employee to successfully perform the essential functions of this job. Reasonable accommodations may be made to enable individuals with disabilities to perform the essential functions.
Work is in an office setting and generally sedentary with physical effort associated with using a computer, but may involve walking or standing for brief periods of time.
May be required to occasionally lift, carry, push, pull, or otherwise move objects up to 25 pounds.

I have read this a dozen times and I STILL don't know what type of company this is much less what they are after.

When did people start communicating like this?

[Siegmund]

As a cynic who works in a technical field... I tend to see a lot of managers of big companies and heads of small ones who communicate just like that; knowing nothing about the operations of the company and everything about fancy doublespeak seems to be key to getting hired into such positions.

It amazes me that somehow the companies survive, even if it means they inflict twice the overhead on themselves they really need to.

Meanwhile, if that isn't your style, you probably are well advised to steer clear of companies who write their ads that way.

[Zelandakh]

Some companies write their ads in such a way as to try and hide their identities. Presumably they think the knowledge is some kind of competitive advantage for their competition. Also, some job descriptions get written from standard templates which then find their way into the ads. I suspect the quoted "General Manager" ad comes from the latter approach.

[billw55]

Agree it could just be human resources boilerplate.

Also, companies frequently know who they want to hire, but still have to go through the motions of a selection process. They may not want to attract legitimate, but unknown, candidates.

[mycroft]

Quote

COMPETENCIES
Advanced knowledge of company products, competitors products and product standards

Um, how? Are we hoping to get lucky?

I love these job postings.

And the "need to have years and years of competence" in the computer industry. I remember seeing a job posting that required 10+ years of Java experience...in 2001 (when Java was 6 years old). See that all the time.

(On the other hand, when this story got around a local hangout of computer admins, one of them pointed out that this can be used "for good" as well. There was a US Defence job application for a Martial Arts Trainer Trainer, and per federal regulations, it had to be an open call. So they required "25+ years of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu experience"...i.e. Gracie or his sons. Which, of course, were who they wanted to come in and train their high-level teacher-students in Gracie Jiu Jitsu.)

[ggwhiz]

Lots of jokes out there and a gazillion where they don't tell you the name of the company.

My fave the last few years ends with Masters or PHD preferred, $12 an hour. That was REALLY prevalent here as Nortel went down the tubes.

ps. Colorado is one thing but if you are considering Canada take note that 80% of our population lives within 100 miles of the U.S. border. Why? We huddle together to keep warm.

[kenberg]

Mostly I just wish you the best with your move.

As to when people started having trouble communicating, I note that when I took my first "professional" job (doing mathematics instead of moving furniture) in 1960, I was there for at least a month before I realized that they thought I was there permanently and I was planning on starting grad school in the fall.

Sometimes these people just talk funny. I recall once during a hiring process we had to fill out forms to show that our actions were sufficiently affirmative. In one column we had to list the "minorities" we had interviewed. In another column we had to list the "other minorities" we had interviewed. Another time we all were told we had to sign some sort of document about drug usage. I have never even smoked mj but the wording was so incomprehensible and generally awful that I felt I couldn't sign it. Others felt the same way so eventually there was a compromise agreement that we would sign something saying that we had read it.

But the one I really wish I had kept a copy of was the loyalty oath I signed in 1967. Of course I had to say I wasn't a communist, but mostly I was committing myself to defend the State of Maryland if it was attacked by surrounding states. "Repel the Northern scum" is in our state song, or at least it used to be, My more liberal friend simply can't recall signing such a document but I imagine they did. If Pennsylvania attacks, I am ready!

I really have no idea who makes this stuff up.

In my semi-retirement years I can afford to say that I am not working for anyone that puts this sort of crap in writing, but there was a time when I needed to just look the other way and sign.. Maybe you could compromise and accept a job on the condition that you never have to work with whoever wrote the document.

Anyway, back to the main point. Best wishes, may you choose well.


Ken

[hrothgar]

Phil, on 2012-July-26, 17:16, said:

I have read this a dozen times and I STILL don't know what type of company this is much less what they are after.

These posting are for commandants for the NWO re-education camps...

Its actually a pretty cushy gig. Supposedly you get your own black helicopter.

[jjbrr]

Google "Responsible for the overall management/coordination of all aspects of company business at a location including production, sales, technical support, customer service, human resources, safety and administrative activities; plans and directs these functions in order to meet operational and financial goals for the location" and it's readily apparent that this is taken from a template.

It was pretty clearly written to be entirely generic.

[luke warm]

ggwhiz, on 2012-July-27, 12:15, said:

Colorado is one thing but if you are considering Canada take note that 80% of our population lives within 100 miles of the U.S. border. Why? We huddle together to keep warm.

huh!! i'd have figured it was to be closer to quality (and relatively quick) health care

good luck phil

[onoway]

luke warm, on 2012-July-27, 15:35, said:

huh!! i'd have figured it was to be closer to quality (and relatively quick) health care

good luck phil

Stats say we pay less, live longer and have lower infant mortality. We have to wait longer for some procedures, very true, at least in comparison to that percentage of Americans who have adequate insurance... but nobody here ever has to choose between selling their house or getting medical help. And of course for the large percentage of those Americans who have inadequate or no coverage there is no comparison, as a longer wait time is preferable to never.

Far from perfect but far far better than the alternative.

As far as the ad goes... In my (very limited) experience such ads tend to reflect a company that wants to keep all its options open and can be a very difficult outfit to work for because of that mindset. Of course, they might just be in a bind and therefore went with the fastest and easiest route, too.

Very best of luck to you and your family, Phil.

[ggwhiz]

onoway, on 2012-July-28, 20:24, said:

Stats say we pay less,

Au contraire mon chum. As I posted before, our liver transplant is free but we pay through the nose for our booze. It's all paid for, just a shared expense.

In fact, since the revenue goes through the hands of politicians the leakage may make our system more inneficient. However, the fact that no drunk is left behind is my strong preference.

[jdeegan]

Best of luck in what is still a rather difficult job market. Lots of internet job postings are essentially bogus for one reason or another. You should reply to them with boiler plate of your own. Waste no time on it. If they have a legit job, and their word scanners identify the right key words in your resume, you might actually get a phone call. From there it is not impossible that you might get a face to face interview.

Personal contacts from past coworkers are probably still your best shot. Get on the phone. Try to get e-mail addresses so you can follow up later. You also might consider a targeted mailing to people who might be your future boss. For that you need something like membership lists for professional societies. Attend professional conferences if you can manage it and try to network. Consider temp work. It can lead to good things and bring in some money in the mean time.