Posted 2012-January-27, 16:28
Okay, there's two threads going on here, and I missed one. So:
The OP started by asking "if you were looking to educate, how would you do it" - and then when someone asked for an example, people were going with "sounds silly from experienced players to experienced opponents" and "...and 'I want to prove I'm right.'" Experienced opponents aren't the problem, in my mind - they should know the rules, and if they don't follow them, then I'm not calling the TD for education, I'm calling to get a ruling on the hand, and assuming that if any education has to happen, the TD will be using the time-honoured "obviously they don't listen with their ears, time to make them listen with their results" method.
The problem is the newer players - who just don't get it - and the people who do it often enough to irritate, but probably aren't needing it as a crutch. We're talking alternatives to the Experienced Player's "I could call the TD on that, but I won't" - which *is* condescending, not helpful (because EP can't explain to the newer player why what they did was wrong, in their high dudgeon, not in a way the newer player can understand), and occasionally either flat-out-wrong, or not a problem for the newer player's peers (even if it would be a spectacular problem for the EP and his partner). In those cases, expressing that "I was told something different, and it intrigues me. Let's find out from the TD what's supposed to happen" works better - even if you *do* know you're right (after all, the EP above knows he's right, too, even when he isn't :-).
Now, if *I* pulled that "I'm not sure..." trick, when I was in fact sure, everyone would know I was laying it on with a trowel, and it wouldn't work. Better for me to either call the TD for a ruling, or explain carefully myself (if I think these players will accept it), or talk to the TD later and let the TD do what she would with it (including ignore it), or just drop it altogether. But I'm an exception, and there are about 200 of us exceptions in the ACBL.
I have been known to call and say "I'm sure the player did everything correctly, but this situation occurred, and I just want to make sure we all agree on the facts." Sometimes, it's been because I was reserving my rights, and sometimes it was (as the other opponent has occasionally remarked) "he just wanted to let you know that there are issues when you bid after my long hesitation." I just smile - and I won't tell you which is which :-).
Now, the other comment - about wishing to waive my right to a rectification - the way the laws read, it is one of my rights to request, (as it is one of the TD's rights to deny that request). The TD can't waive the penalty on her own, nor can I (once the infraction has been brought to attention). But I can ask, and the TD can grant my request. In an education call, the alternative is to not mention the infraction and not call the TD - which waives my rights very effectively as it turns out. Given that both of those actions are legal, the field can go hang. And so can any opponent who thinks I'm looking for a break later - after all, if I feel like I need to do some education, any penalty that comes by is the least of the insult. I don't expect a break at all, unless the education gets received clearly (and usually I get a "thank you", and they try to beat me on the next hand), and sometimes not even then.
I'm reminded of the time I actually used the phrase - the very Polish and obviously new-to-Canada opponents opened 2♦, 5-5 in two suits not both minors. When the hand had ended, I mentioned that I "thought" that may not be legal in our game, and called the TD. I requested to waive any penalty, and claimed that I thought my partner and I should be able to handle the call (after all, the previous week we were playing a crazy Swedish-style club system against a homegrown forcing pass, for fun) but in case they came up against a pair who was less laidback than we, could you confirm that this is legal?
And the phrase in the lawbook is "for cause". Certainly, disability is such a cause - such as the time one player sorted her hand, then lost control of one of her hands and dropped 4 clubs, face up, on the table. But it's not the only one. I personally treat "for cause" very liberally, and I'd be unwilling to meet someone's request when the cause is clearly "these are my friends, and I don't want to hurt their score, given our 30% game" and that's pretty much it.
Blackshoe: re: upset at volunteered information before the OL: I didn't get it either. I'm not able at this time to do the forumsearch, but the last time I mentioned it, I did get such a response.
When I go to sea, don't fear for me, Fear For The Storm -- Birdie and the Swansong (tSCoSI)