Posted 2011-August-06, 01:53
Lurpoa,
If you actually want to be a member of the community that's great. Usually people who want to be a member of a community want to be at least likable to some section of that community. I will take you at face value that you are not just trolling, and genuinely do not understand what you to be unlikable to many people in the community. Hopefully this constructive criticism will help you solve this issue.
1) Your first contribution to this thread was to call my post of "I love redheads" sexist.
Problem 1: Obviously you did not get the redheaded stepchild joke, that's fine. You do not seem to understand what the word sexist means, that is not as good sense you are using it to describe and criticize someone elses post. The difference is, not understanding english perfectly is one thing, you are not expected to understand all words or jokes. However, if you are criticizing or calling another forum member a word you do not understand, that is YOUR problem, and it is not right, and people will dislike you for it.
Problem 2: It simply derails the thread for no reason. People do not react well to that. Yes, my comment was not on point of the hand, but it was a joke relating to the thread title, that at least a few people seemed to enjoy (note the + vote application), so at least it added value. If you consistently add no value to threads and just hijack them, that is not a likable trait.
Overall, your post was simply a burden to the community, and lowered the quality of the thread. It came off as you simply attacking me because of our previous history. It is ok to not like me, it's not endearing if you attack me in threads for no reason with words you don't understand for posts that you don't understand. If you have a problem with posts, try to understand them, if you cannot understand them then PM a mod or the person in question. That is how to solve problems without being annoying.
2) Your response to me pointing out that my post was not sexist was to tell me to use different media to post things.
Problem: Again, you are adding nothing but a derailment to the thread. You seem to simply be attacking me. When your response to being proven wrong is to attack someone in a different manner, again contributing nothing to a thread, people will not like you. At this point, I decided not to reply to you, since it seemed to me that you simply wanted to start a bitchfest rather than actually make any kind of point or contribute anything to the thread.
3) Someone explained what I meant. Instead of taking any accountability, you gave an apology laced with excuses. You even suggested that the burden should be on ME that you do not understand english very well.
Problem 1: It is people 101 that when you are apologizing, you do not make excuses if you are actually sorry.
Problem 2: Of course it is fine to post on an english speaking forum if you are not fluent in english. I'm happy people do. However, the burden is on THOSE people if they do not understand some words. Those people should be careful in using them, and careful in attacking others unprovoked if they do not understand something, understanding that they do not know english very well and might be wrong. It is NOT the problem of somebody else to coddle those who don't speak enlgish perfectly, you voluntarily choose to post here and should understand that.
Problem 3: You once again play the victim card, acting like people are posting "viritol." So far in this thread, I made a joke and you told me A) That it was sexist, and B) When informed what the word sexist meant, you told me to post somewhere else. You are the only one who has attacked anyone, or had "viritol," and you were wrong. Nobody likes someone who acts like a victim, especially when all they contributed to a thread is to attack someone unprovoked, and were not even attacked in reply.
4) Since then, you have simply played the victim card and STILL contributed nothing to the thread. You are quite simply being annoying at this point, and this all started with your mistake!
To put it bluntly, nobody will like you if you behave this way. Nobody will feel sorry for you when you were the one at fault, and took no accountability and simply started whining/crying about it. People will respect you if you don't attack people baselessly, or if you do and are proven wrong, you understand it was your fault and simply say sorry and move on. I have no idea if your intention is to simply troll the forum now or what, but if you actually have any desire to be a part of the community rather than a hated troll then try to contribute to the forum and threads and not start these issues in every single thread.
You are accountable for:
-Your less than perfect english
-The response people give you when you hijack a thread
-The response people give you when you act like a victim after starting drama
-The response people give you when you attack them baselessly
-The response people give you for giving excuses and taking no accountability while ostensibly apologizing
-The response people give you for contributing nothing to a thread
I am sure you think everyone is ganging up on you and it is their fault and you have done nothing wrong, but that's silly. Everyone else seems to be able to mostly get along and be a part of the community without getting banned or being ostracisized and disliked by everyone, why not you? It is because of your behavior, not because of a conspiracy by everyone else, and if your behavior changes, so will peoples attitudes towards you.
I mean this completely constructively, after this if your behavior does not change I will simply ignore you.
Good luck!
Help
JLOGIC, on 2011-August-04, 04:56, said:
