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Convention bashing Please load it off here...

#1 User is offline   cherdano 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:00

I am sick off reading all the same arguments for the 100th time, so please load it off here, and keep other threads free from it, thanks. At least, give it a try.

I will make a start.
Arend

Gerber is badbadbadbad
Cappelletti is horriblehorriblehorrible
Dont play dont just dont dont dont
F* is...
NFB?? Ugh Ugh Ugh

Please go ahead.
The easiest way to count losers is to line up the people who talk about loser count, and count them. -Kieran Dyke
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#2 Guest_Jlall_*

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:01

5N.
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#3 User is offline   han 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:03

1C, also.
Please note: I am interested in boring, bog standard, 2/1.

- hrothgar
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#4 User is offline   joshs 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:11

Jlall, on Feb 22 2006, 03:01 PM, said:

5N.

I played 5N making 5 3 times last year, winning lots of imps each time. So don't make fun of 5N. :P
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#5 User is offline   mikeh 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:23

mini-roman 2♦
'one of the great markers of the advance of human kindness is the howls you will hear from the Men of God' Johann Hari
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#6 Guest_Jlall_*

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:26

raptor... *cough*
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#7 User is offline   Free 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:30

strong 1♦ *puke*
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#8 User is offline   mike777 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:35

mikeh, on Feb 22 2006, 03:23 PM, said:

mini-roman 2♦

I hope this means mini roman 2clubs is ok in a strong club setting.

Geez so far only bashing the conventions I do play except for F*F and even Hamman plays that one :P.

Last train to Clarksville, I am told by my pick up partners this always describes their hand perfectly "why cannot you bid/not bid slam now"

Double, again "it described my hand perfectly..how can you pass/bid now!"

Serious 3NT. " how can you think it was natural you idiot"

Partners who lead from weak suits..uggg...
Partners who do not return my leads uggg....

A quick sorry for all my wrong/misguided competitive bids/passing that were idiotic!

A quick sorry for all my passing/bidding over my partner's doubles that were wrong!

A quick sorry for all my visualizing partners holding impossible cards and shape!
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#9 User is offline   han 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:36

I have heard all of these insults:

Bergen raises: outdated!
Sounds openings: hate them!
Light openings: awful!
Mini-NT: only good against bunnies!
Raptor: do I need to say more?
Penalty doubles: grow up please!
Kickback: asking for trouble!
Short club: a blunt weapon!
Stolen-Bid doubles: only played by LOLs!
Transfer preempts: helping out the opponents!
Weak jump shifts: preempt your partner!
Strong jump shifts: still waiting for the hand!
Swiss raises: never bid Jacoby again!
2/1 promise no rebid: Yuck!
Acol: the reason Brits don't win at bridge!
IQ-doubles: refuse to play them!
Multi: see transfer preempt!
Weak 2D: can't call that a preempt!
Blackwood: overrated!
4th suit GF: show don't ask!
Serious: 3NT is to play!
Stayman: Keri is the answer!
Relays: learn to play bridge first!

I'm sure that there are more.
Please note: I am interested in boring, bog standard, 2/1.

- hrothgar
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#10 User is offline   joshs 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:39

I love all conventions, when my opponents play them. :P
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#11 User is offline   han 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:43

Good one Josh, that reminds me of odd/even (roman) discards.
Please note: I am interested in boring, bog standard, 2/1.

- hrothgar
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#12 User is offline   Al_U_Card 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:47

You forgot MUDdle leads
The Grand Design, reflected in the face of Chaos...it's a fluke!
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#13 User is offline   david_c 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:48

Nice thread. Is it OK to bash natural bids as well? I wanna take a swipe at playing 1♠:2♣ as natural and forcing to game: what a waste of space!

Yeah, this is fun :P
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#14 User is offline   Free 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:50

what about transfers to the suit below? :P
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#15 User is offline   Al_U_Card 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 14:52

The absolute best is:

My pard misbids his hand after an overcall.

I misbid my rebid

We end up in 3NT (should be in 6H or 6D) with our clubs being stiff T facing Jx

LHO doesn't lead the suit he overcalled but leads clubs

RHO plays low!

Making five for + .1 imps!!!

Who needs conventions? :P
The Grand Design, reflected in the face of Chaos...it's a fluke!
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#16 User is offline   mikeh 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 15:05

Fishbein: doubles of preempts are penalty, an overcall in the cheapest suit is takeout


This is bad, but not as bad as reverse fishbein:

Double is takeout and an overcall in the cheapest suit is penalty
'one of the great markers of the advance of human kindness is the howls you will hear from the Men of God' Johann Hari
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#17 User is offline   Cascade 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 15:36

Free, on Feb 23 2006, 09:50 AM, said:

what about transfers to the suit below? B)

We have a pair playing that in NZ.

I don't know the details but their opening bids at the one-level show the suit below the suit bid.
Wayne Burrows

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Bidding is an estimation of probabilities SJ Simon

#18 User is offline   han 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 15:55

Reverse Fishbein, I love it!
Please note: I am interested in boring, bog standard, 2/1.

- hrothgar
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#19 User is offline   luke warm 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 18:03

i've seen world champions play almost all the ones that are really and truly hated by a majority of bbf posters... so the worst i can say about some of them is, they don't fit my temperment...

it's just hard for me to say that any certain convention is horrible when there are pairs playing it (whatever "it" is) better than most of the people i know
"Paul Krugman is a stupid person's idea of what a smart person sounds like." Newt Gingrich (paraphrased)
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#20 User is offline   mr1303 

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Posted 2006-February-22, 18:11

You missed puppet stayman. The "please tell opponents both player's hands before they lead" convention.
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